Two strange conversations

#1
Me: Goodnight sweetie, I'll see you tomorrow.
Madeline: Mommy, more pee diaper.
Me: What?
Her: More pee diaper.
Me: More pee diaper? You peed more in your diaper?
Her: Yep
Me: We just put the diaper on. What do you mean more pee? Did you pee before in your diaper?
Her: No pee diaper, pee couch.
Me: You peed on the couch?
Her: Yeah.
Me: Really? You peed on the couch?
Her: Yep.
Me: Where? Out by daddy?
Her: Yeah.
Me: Why did you pee on the couch?
Her: (nothing)
Me: Honey, there's no peeing on the couch.
Her: Okay

Me: Thor, did Madeline pee on the couch out there?
Thor: No.
Me: She's crazy.

#2
Hairdresser lady: Is the haircut for her?
Me: Yes
Hairdresser lady: Does she wiggle?
Me: Well, she's two.
Hairdresser lady: Oh, well I can't cut it if she wiggles.
Me: (nothing...)
Hairdresser lady: I have a weird phobia of cutting hair on wiggley kids.
Me: Um, Okay...
Hairdresser Lady: You have to wait for (some guy who ran an errand) to get back.
Me: Um, okay, we'll just do it another time.